1. Work for me is most effective when it’s enjoyable, unique, relevant, fulfilling, and progressive. If what I do consistently fails to deliver these criteria, it’s time to review what changes need to be made.
2. In this context, living to work for me is as important as working to live. So I see my best work not as a means to an end but rather the (enjoyable, unique, relevant, fulfilling, and progressive) means that engenders the end.
3. I'm not responsible for others, but I am in how I respond.
My moment to moment experience (including my responses) always follows and is created by my thinking. Remembering this, provides me with an opportunity to choose which thoughts to pay attention to, and which not. This is my responsibility; the ability to respond or not to my thoughts. It is also free will.
4. Listening only to my own personal thoughts gets noisy. Only a quiet mind hears wisdom. The same applies to my clients.
5. A core question I like to ask myself and others is ‘how is this feeling useful?’ I'm not interested in whether the feeling appears right/wrong, good/bad, true/not true.
Asking how a painful feeling is useful - is generative, as it encourages me to look in a direction which, given the chance, will always reveal a mistaken belief about myself, and therefore life.
Once an inaccurate belief is found and corrected, it's this that will inform and shape my adventure going forwards.
6. When coaching, I take my lead from that part of me which connects with the person I'm working with, trusting the infinite intelligence beneath the surface, which is available to us both.
7. A main purpose of my work is to help bring about peace of mind through the confidence of being part of an infinitely wider system designed to self-heal.
This inevitably brings with it a sense of forgiveness, compassion, playful curiosity, freedom and ultimately completeness. It enables us to really feel and trust insight (fresh thinking).
True insight lies beyond the intellect leaving space for it to do what it is designed for best - informed by insight.
8. Knowledge is power, and as an emergent quality is something we all have access to.
9. There's a part inside all of us (we may call it resilience) which remains healthy and kind; untouched by all that happens to us. In all momentary feelings, we have the ability to connect us back to this part.
10. Acknowledgement and gratitude are strong catalysts for change; synchronising our personal mind with the impersonal and infinitely loving mind.
"It is a bit embarrassing to have been concerned with the human problem all one's life and find at the end that one has no more to offer by way of advice than 'try to be a little kinder."
11. All emotions can be traced either to the roots of love,
completeness, belonging, connection, security; or fear, separation, attachment, disconnection, insecurity. Every thought, word, and action moves us towards or away from these polarities, moment to moment.
12. Experience through feeling, always follows thought.
We may not be able to choose our thoughts or feelings, but we can choose which of them passing through to pay attention to and which to dismiss. (They all have value, if we so choose). In this way, we are always choosing how we experience life.
13. Everything in life and work involves relationship. The true purpose and function of any relationship is a joining of Mind.
14. Fragmentation and separation bring pain and this takes many different forms.
this page last updated December 2019